


The Road to Hell

by CaitN



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Porn Battle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-24
Updated: 2011-01-24
Packaged: 2017-10-15 01:36:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/155645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaitN/pseuds/CaitN
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place between Season 3 and Season 4. Sam's not proud of who he's become.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Road to Hell

The hotel was just another in the long line of pay-by-the-hour stopovers. Sam had lost count of how many he'd stayed in, in about as many cities. The only constant was Ruby. She always found him, even when he didn't want to be.

It'd started out with the blood. He'd only drink a little, every day or so. Just enough to keep him sharp. Without Dean to watch his back, he needed every edge he could get.

The first kiss had been an explosion, a spur-of-the-moment, hell-why-not affair that left them both breathless and unsatisfied. After that, it would have been weird to not have sex.

Ruby had proven to be just as determined and ruthless in bed as out. Several times Sam had worried that he'd have to make an unplanned – and embarrassing – trip to the emergency room afterwards. Somewhere between Seattle and San Antonio he'd gotten wise and started drinking before sex. Blood, not booze. Though sometimes the two went hand-in-hand. It toughened him up, heightened his senses, made him feel invincible. In his mind, it made him her equal, not her bitch.

He finally ran out of steam in Detroit. The nest of Vampires had been comprised mostly of young girls. He'd taken three showers afterward and still didn't feel clean. It was necessary, he knew that. But for some reason, that one time, it really fucked with his mind. Right and wrong didn't matter any more. And that was what scared him the most.

"I'm tired of running." The covers were tangled around his feet, her hair tickling his chest.

"Running? I thought you were hunting?" She ran her hand lazily up and down his side.

He pushed her off and sat up, staring blankly at the crappy mural across from the bed. "I'm running away, just like I've always done. Running away from losing Dean, from responsibility, from my demons. No pun intended."

She sat astride him, taking his face in her hands so he couldn't look away. "You’re fighting, Sam, fighting to make things right. Fighting the only way you know how. Dean would be proud of you."

Moisture glistened in Sam’s eyes for the first time since he'd buried his brother. "Sometimes I hate myself," he half-whispered.

"Don't we all," she answered, taking his mouth in a punishing kiss.


End file.
